Thursday 23 October 2014

Guest Blogger - Wrestling with meatballs

EDITORS NOTE - Dont forget to get in touch with our guest blogger Krysta and be sure to tune into LoWdown on Tuesday between 6/8pm EST to get interactive with us and share your thoughts. Give Krysta your feedback on twitter at @krysta_ibach 

Wrestling, much like pasta, can get bland...


Spaghetti, Fettuccini, Fusilli, Ziti, Cavatappi, Macaroni, Penne, Rotini, Rigatoni, Fiori, Rotelle. 

All kinds of pasta; usually made from wheat; each shape is well suited to a specific sauce. But if eaten naked; shapes mean little as it all tastes the same.

So it is with wrestling; regardless of what the wrestler looks like; if they all do just a 5 move set (AKA 
the five moves of doom [FMOD]) and do them in the same order (and some of them do...don’t deny it!). Then regardless if the wrestlers are killing it in the ring; it comes across as stale and uninspired. 

John Cena would be a prime example of this; even with his recent programs with the Wyatt’s, Lesnar...even with Randy Orton – who contrary to popular belief they actually haven’t faced off as much as people claim they have; but the matches are always the same...STU (STFU); Attitude Adjustment (AA); RKO...RKO...RKO...RKO (Handy that it’s also Randy’s initials...incase a AA scrambles his brains); Five Knuckle Shuffle (You Can’t See Me); Kick out...kick out...kick out...RKO...RKO (Out of nowhere...thank you Maggle) STU ...AA...Clothesline...clothesline...drop out of the ring... run around the ring... sneaky move ...RKO ...RKO ...RKO...AA...Five Knuckle Shuffle...Pin for the win. RKO in retaliation. So regardless of how little they actually do face off; it’s all the same shit so it begins to feel as if we have seen this tired old story more often then we actually have. 


This argument can be applied to almost any ongoing pairing on the roster both current and past. 
However it shouldn’t matter how often two wrestlers face off; it’s more about the kind of match they produce, which lends itself to the argument of allowing wrestlers in WWE have an expanded move set. Like all good pasta dishes you’ll always have the ‘Go-To’ sauce that will get the job done; but you also have the ‘WOW’ sauce recipe to pull out when you have return guests, because you don’t always want to be serving the same marinara when a white wine sauce would be the better offering. Same with wrestlers; if they face off against someone they have wrestled a few times and they trust one another in the ring; then that should be the time to pull out some of the stops in the match; to ‘WOW’ the 
crowd...wowing the crowd will bring them back for more, and will keep them talking. Don’t believe me, just track the twitter-verse under #RAW and see what people are talking about. It’s pretty safe to say they aren’t raving about Orton’s RKO...Sheamus’ Brogue Kick (outta nowhere!) or even Cena’s AA. It’s why Bray Wyatt got as over as he did; he was fascinating; Daniel Bryan too...he mixed it up. Cody Rhodes doing flips off the Steel Cage; people talk about that. 

WWE may be the only big name game in town but even so; they need to break out the white wine 
sauce...because the Marinara is just not razzing the berries anymore. I’m here all week...try the chicken tika...

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